The golden years
Originally published 10/24/2019
What I know now in my fifties is so different from what I thought I knew when I was younger- in my teens, twenties and thirties. As I get older, I realize that I did not know it all when I was a teenager like I used to tell my parents back then. I was not at the peak of my life in my twenties like my friends and I were so sure that we were. And I was definitely not over the hill in my thirties like my kids would have me believe.
I am here to tell you all that fifty is ‘the’ number. This is the golden age. It is not at twenty-one. Not at thirty. Not even at forty. There is so much magic in turning fifty that you would be astounded. The changes can be subtle, but in my case they were not so much so. I like to say that I turned fifty on a Sunday and on Monday I woke up as a whole new person.
What I’m I talking about?
Well you know how when we were in our teens, we all thought we knew it all, but now I really do know a lot of things if not everything. And while I thought I was at the peak of life in my twenties, no, no… I am just now at the top of it. And to my kiddos who think I am over the hill? No way, Jose, life is just getting started.
There is a self awareness and assuredness and confidence that I have never experienced before. I am more outspoken and assertive and able to stand up for myself and others. I have less tolerance for intolerance and BS. I speak my mind and give my unsolicited opinion without apology.
I think people gradually grow into themselves and then at fifty, a sort of unveiling or awakening happens. Your true self, the person you always strived to be is born.
Can you imagine being a person who knows what they want and not shy about saying it. Someone who is so self assured that they could care less what people have to say about it.
If you are lucky enough to get older, this is something I wish everyone out there, especially women, would experience.
Why specifically women?
Women traditionally are more likely to go along to get along. We tend to be people pleasers. The peacemakers. The nurturers. The compromisers. The voices of reason. We tend to be all this, not only at home or with our friends, but also in our professional life. Consequently, we don’t get the respect we deserve, we get passed over for promotions and often miss out on career advancements.
It is no coincidence that most women achieve career highs in their fifties. We spend our 30s and 40s working hard, being the cogs on the wheel and then boom! We get to 50 and the realization hits us. That change in attitude in the fifties, even for a short period of time yields so much gain for us.
So to those dreading the magical number- the big 5-0, dread no more. This is a fantastic age. This is the start of the ‘year of you’. In your fifties, you will know everything- well almost. This is the time when you will be rounding off the peak of that mountain. When you are not over the hill but on top of it.
Have you had a similar awakening in your 50s? Comment below and let me know.
As always, thanks for reading.
J